I made you this collage of rats and bears. You're welcome.

A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words

They say that a picture is worth 1000 words. It's true. All you have to do is flip through your own photo album or check out the photos of the day over at National Geographic to recall or invent stories that go along with each image.  Like this one.

Boy With Balloon, India
Photograph by Kamala Kannan 

Doesn't that just tell a hundred potential tales? Hubby says the kid is probably running from zombies. Balloon-loving zombies.

What about a picture that says 1000 words that are unrelated to its own visual image? I happen to have such a painting on my bedroom wall.

You see, it's a painting of an elephant but it tells the story of a beautiful friendship.

I'm thankful for this stuff

(see below for update)

I'm kind of shallow sometimes. I admit it.

So instead of going for the big points on what I'm thankful for, like the liberation of blank from blank, the fact that the Canadian Space Agency is still going strong and that so many people I know are expecting little bundles of joy/sleepless nights next year, I decided to be thankful for some of the less significant, more mundane things in my life.

1. My husband is not a douche canoe. Woo!
2. I finally got to say douche canoe in a post.
3. My dog does not have fleas.
4. It's not quite sunny but at least it's not raining right now.
5. My friends pretty much rock. And will paint rocks with me this weekend. That's pretty cool.
6. My couch is super comfy.
7. They made a TV show of The Walking Dead.
8. My son poops on the potty now. Mostly.
9. There are very few spiders in my house or they are really good at hiding. Maybe both.
10. A new bird of paradise bloomed in my yard today.

Run, Rick!  Run!

NOTE: I have no idea why Zemanta would suggest Kieth Richards or Jesus as tags for this post but they were listed so how could I not include them?


UPDATE: No lie - I haven't seen a spider in my house in months and about 15 minutes after hitting 'publish' a spider scrabbled up the wall behind me. I swear it was this guy, Patrick from the article 'Spiders' from Cracked.com, all watching over my shoulder while I typed.

Related articles

• Iconic robotic Canadarm marks its 30th birthday (ctv.ca)
• The Walking Dead: "Secrets" Review Secrets! On Hershel's farm, everyone's got them. Level 8 by Eric Goldman (imullins89.wordpress.com)

Picture Song and Breaking up with a Cold

Woke up at about 4:30am today with a coughing fit. "Hello Cold" I thought to myself. Then I said "You know Cold, you're a real jerk" and I tried to break up with it because it's not just being attentive and interested in me anymore, now it's just being clingy and stalker like. I'm just not getting anything out of the relationship, you know what I mean?

I know, I know, you guys are getting that vibe how when one of your friends keeps complaining about her boyfriend or husband, 'Oh he's such a jerk he did blah blah blah' and after 6 months of listening and sympathizing you just want to punch her in the face and tell her to either break up or shut up. Please don't punch me - I'm actively taking steps to get rid of this Cold-person.

Now the Cold is trying to break up my marriage by making me look stupid and annoying. This is what it did to sabotage my marriage this morning:

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

Me singing (upon walking in house after dropping Ender*): 'I thought about you for a long time, can't seem to get you off of my mind, I can't understand why we're living life this waaaaaaay'. (by Kid Rock/Sheryl Crow)

R: Stop doing that, you're going to hurt your voice.

Me: Wait what? I don't sound like Sheryl Crow?

R: No.

Me: Oh. Well, do I sound like Kid Rock?

R: A little - but more gravelly. I'm not a fan.

Me: *mumble* I made R's ears sad. Thanks Cold.

And the Cold is SO not invited to Thanksgiving. Seriously it had better not even think of showing itself after today. I'll even help it pack up and move on out. Of my body.

Do you think the Cold will sit around somewhere listening to 'Picture' after it leaves? The irony!

*at preschool, not on the ground

UPDATE:  And it had better give me my damn voice back when it leaves!! 

Related articles

• 10 Reasons why you should try to have all your colds before you have kids. (scribblesaurus.blogspot.com)

Feeling blue? Get stoned.

I really like these. I'm going to make some if I get some spare time over Thanksgiving and then use them for inspiration and creating feel-good emotions in myself.

And then when Esmerelda comes over with bottles of wine I will probably try to convince her of how cool they are by tossing them at her until she agrees. 

Whoa whoa whoa! WTF PETA?

I am a huge animal advocate who adopted my doggy BFF Kyssa from the Vancouver Pound almost 12 years ago. When I worked at a large law firm in Vancouver I was in charge of the firm's BCSPCA Paws for a Cause campaign every year before moving to California. So I'm not someone who just sits around at home whining about the poor abused animals, I get out there and work to make a change.

But PETA - when you start trying to scare my kid I'm gonna have to ask you to back the hell up. PETA's latest billboard campaign features a picture of a Jack Russell Terrier's head on a turkey's body with the words 'KIDS: If you wouldn't eat your dog, why eat a turkey.  Go vegan.'

If they want to target adults with these ads they can go right ahead but to set their sights on kids - that's just not cool.

Parents who make the effort to teach their children about things like helping the environment, bullying, the Golden Rule and of course compassion for all living things are to be commended and, as one of those parents, I don't appreciate scare tactics.

Does PETA even need to deliver a blow aimed at children to further their cause and, more importantly, will it even work? Consider that a National Turkey Federation survey found that 88% of Americans eat turkey every Thanksgiving as a matter of tradition. Is the dog-turkey hybrid really going to change that?

They might argue that childrens' inherent compassion makes them ideal targets for PETA's cause but I would counter that if their cause is solid enough they don't need to aim at kids. As successful as they may be, PETA might want to consider a better approach. Stop going for the 'any news is publicity' gambit and start taking the high road.

Kyssa does not agree with experimentation on animals.

And I know I know - here we are talking about PETA. Well played.

Healthier Hot Chocolate

It's colder out these days even here in Northern California so I've had a hankering (<--lol) for hot chocolate. Old timey hot chocolate was pretty rich and sugary but I have discovered a bit of a healthier alternative.

Here is the recipe:

1 cup almond milk (unsweetened)
1 tbsp raw brown sugar (or a teeny drip of Stevia liquid)
2 tbsp cocoa powder
dash of cinnamon

(play with the amounts to suit your own taste)

Now - you could jam this into a cup and microwave it if you are short on time but it is much better if you warm it slowly on the stove. Mix all the dry ingredients together in a small saucepan, add a small amount of the almond milk and stir into a paste. Then add the rest of the milk and continue to stir over low heat until hot.

Pour into a mug, add a marshmallow and an extra sprinkle of cinnamon and you're done.

Ender loves this hot chocolate, it's lactose & soy free and the cinnamon has some anti-inflammatory properties. If I know my kid we'll be making this more than once over the Thanksgiving weekend, especially if the weather is nice enough to go out and do some outdoor activities.