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It rattled around in my head for a couple of days so finally last night as I was on my way to bed I decided to tell my husband that such a day existed. Oh how naive I was, assuming that if I didn't know then he didn't know.
Me: Hey hon - guess what! There is a whole day dedicated to steak and bj's! It's March 14.
R: Yeah, I know. It's a pretty big deal.
Me: What? You knew about this? How? Why didn't I?
R: Oh totally. It's widely celebrated among men.
Me: Well, maybe men would have more success with it if they told women. Unless they're gay.
R: Don't you think gays enjoy steak and BJs?
Me: That's not what I said. But it's a pretty win-win day for them. I just meant they don't need women to know about it. Maybe every day is steak and BJ day for them.
R: Women DO know about it. That's why men are celebrating.
Me: How long have you known about this 'special day'?
Me: That seems stupid that you didn't tell me. Now I'm picturing you sitting on the couch, late at night, every March 14 after I've gone to bed. Staring at your laptop, looking at pictures of delectable steaks that millions of lucky men are uploading. Alone in the dark, reading threads about their epic BJs. While you weep into your cookie dough ice cream feeling cold and sad and isolated.
R: No, no, I don't do that. I don't know why I never mentioned it.
Me: Oh just you WAIT until March 14 this year, mister! Yeah, that's a threat.
Why do I get myself into these things? Anyone free on Mar. 14/12? Wanna earn some money? I'm joking. Don't send the cops after me. I'm no madame. If I was I'd be a lot richer.
*evidently the equivalent for women is Valentines Day. I call bullshit.