On Word Usage

Some things seem to exist only to drive you mad.  Like the dreaded 'ear worm' (thanks Rick Astley) certain words bug the shit out of me.

10 WORDS THAT BUG THE SHIT OUT OF ME

1.  McAnything.  Adding an erroneous 'Mc' to the beginning of any word is done.  It's over folks.  Stop it right meow.

eg.  "Wow, that cat is Super McFast!".

Nope, not unless you fry it in old grease and serve it up between a couple of petrified hamburger buns.  I'm not saying that doesn't exist somewhere, but likely not in your neighbor's yard. Depending where you live.  Dammit you know what I mean!  No more McStupid McFakey words.*

*Before you start drafting up your witty rebuttals, know that 'Mac' is also included. You MacSmartasses.

2.  Uber.  In and of itself, this word isn't all that bad.  In a weird way it sort of makes me think of IKEA.  It's a satisfactorally composed word that's pretty easy to put together.  Except that some people refuse to read the directions.

eg. "That gear on your level 48 fury warrior is pretty uber!"

Wrong!  Uber should only be used as an adjective BEFORE the noun.  Not as a standalone at the end of a sentence.

eg.  "You have such an uber 'chant on your chest piece that Gruul is reduced to swatting at you like a kitten."

Correct.  You wouldn't put the drawers in before tightening the bolts on the frame, now would you?

3.  Winning.  'Winning' is for losers.  The end.

4.  Bro.  Are you a super tanned, super ripped twenty-something that spends every moment of his free time surfing in either California or Australia, living in a tent and eating grubs and seaweed (while hiding a secret trust fund) in order to establish your cred?  Oh you are?  Ok, then you can say 'bro'.  If not, don't.

5.  Number 1 and Number 2 as alternatives to Pee and Poo.  Come on!!  With all the things that us parents have to worry about, are you really that concerned that your kid say pee or poo?  Do you think they will go their whole lives excusing themselves to go 1 or 2?  All they are going to do is make up other phrases like 'making butt putty'.  Same goes for using the scientific names.  I just don't see Ender going to the pediatrician and saying 'Why yes, good doctor!  My bowel movements have been regular and solid, thank you.  Indeed.'

6.  Dope.  Things are not dope.  Whether referring to a person or to drugs, it's not really a positive descriptor.

eg.  "That walkman is so dope!"  Really?  A cassette player made of meth that can't string enough words together to form a coherent sentence?  I'll take two!

7.  Score.  Should only be used when referring to which team or individual is winning or losing at a sporting event.  Period.

eg.  "The score is 10-1 Canucks vs San Jose."  Correct.
eg.  "Hey, can you score me some tickets to Nickleback?"  Wrong.  In so many ways, wrong.

8. Burn.  Perfectly acceptable when used to describe something that is on fire.  Not acceptable to taunt the victim of a sarcastic comment.

eg. "Don't burn the house down you little pyromaniac!"  Good usage there.
eg.  "Oooooh, buuuuuurn!"  *ring* *ring*  Hello?  Yes, I'm calling you on your brickish gray Motorola Flip Phone to let you know that you can stop using words from the 90's.  K bye.

9.  Harsh.  Using the word harsh is harsh.  Oh, you see what I did there.

10.  Any celebrity names jammed together to indicate current relationship status.  Brangelina, Bennifer, etc.  I just can't even write about it.  Probably because I'm older than 12.